Why did they build the Great Wall of China?

June 15, 2007 at 4:24 pm | Posted in All, Australia, Melbourne, Something Funny, Travel, TV | 7 Comments

The Great Wall of China

The placard must have been inspired by the Telstra Bigpond’s ad shown in Australian televisions. The video below shows the ad. It’s a crackup. I’ve seen it over and over again but it still doesn’t fail to make me laugh.

What makes the ad funny is the father’s answers to his son’s questions.

  • Nasi Goreng is not a person let alone an emperor of China. It is Indonesian and/or Malaysian(?) for Fried Rice.
  • The Great Wall of China was built during Zhou Dynasty when vassal states each built their own walls. Under the Qin Dynasty the walls were united, a symbol of the now united China. The wall was renovated during the Ming Dynasty.
  • And the rabbits? Calcivirus was first noticed by scientists in China in 1984. The virus has since wiped out 95 % of feral rabbits in parts of China.

Talk about creative marketing.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Wisdom from Garfield

June 14, 2007 at 2:21 pm | Posted in All, Something Funny | Leave a comment

garfieldfat.jpg

Making a baby…

May 30, 2007 at 2:17 pm | Posted in All, Something Funny | 3 Comments

There is not one dirty word in it, and it is funny.

The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a
surrogate father to start their family.

On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife
goodbye and said, “Well, I’m off now; the man should be here soon.”

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer
happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.

Good morning, Ma’am”, he said, “I’ve come to…”

Oh, no need to explain,” Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed, “I’ve been
expecting you.”
“Have you really?” said the photographer. “Well, that’s good. Did you
know babies are my specialty?”
“Well that’s what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a
seat”

After a moment she asked, blushing, “Well, where do we start?”

“Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the
couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room
floor is fun. You can really spread out there.”
“Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn’t work out for Harry and
me!”

“Well, Ma’am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we
try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles,
I’m sure you’ll be pleased with the results.”

“My, that’s a lot!” gasped Mrs. Smith.

“Ma’am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I’d love to be
in and out in five minutes, but I’m sure you’d be disappointed with
that.”
“Don’t I know it,” said Mrs. Smith quietly.

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his
baby pictures. “This was done on the top of a bus,” he said.
“Oh my God!” Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat.

“And these twins turned out exceptionally well – when you consider
their mother was so difficult to work with.”
“She was difficult?” asked Mrs. Smith.
“Yes, I’m afraid so I finally had to take her to the park to get the
job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a
good look.”
“Four and five deep?” said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement.
“Yes”, the photographer replied. “And for more than three hours, too.
The mother was constantly squealing and yelling – I could hardly
concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots.
Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had
to pack it all in.”

Mrs. Smith leaned forward. “Do you mean they actually chewed on your,
uh .equipment?”

“It’s true, Ma’am, yes.. Well, if you’re ready, I’ll set-up my tripod
and we can get to work right away.”

“Tripod?”

“Oh yes, Ma’am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It’s much
too big to be held in the hand very long.”

Mrs. Smith fainted………

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Brushing up on Filipino vocabulary

May 11, 2007 at 2:23 pm | Posted in All, Filipino, Philippines, Something Funny, Tagalog | Leave a comment

I received this in an email from a friend and a former colleague in the Philippines. This is meant to be funny.

“Nararapat lamang na maglaan tayo ng ilang saglit upang muling sariwain ang
mga salitang ipinamana sa atin ng ating mga ninuno! BAKA MALIMUTAN NINYO
ANG SARILING WIKA…”

  1. Abuloy — bayad sa nahigop na kape at nanguyang biskwit sa nilamayang sakla.
  2. Akala —- alam na alam daw.
  3. Aginaldo – inaasahan na makukuha sa araw ng Pasko na mas okay sana kung pera na lang.
  4. Ama —— pamilyadong gustong maging binata
  5. Bakasyon – sandaliang pahinga sa trabahong hingal lang ang pahinga.
  6. Bakit —- tanong na laging mahirap masagot.
  7. Bakya —- tsinelas na may takong. Baga —– lutuan ng mga hindi makabili ng microwave.
  8. Bagoong — masarap na ulam ng mga walang maiulam.
  9. Baldado — hindi mamamatay-matay na mukhang hindi na mabubuhay.
  10. Bale —– suweldong inutang.
  11. Binata —— lalaking gustong maging ama
  12. Biyenan —— anay ng tahanan
  13. Kaaway — ikli ng ‘kaibigan na Inayawan
  14. Kababata – dating gelpren na may ibang boypren
  15. Kabag —- dighay at utot na naghalo sa tiyan
  16. Kabayo — hayop na sinasakyan Ng kalesa
  17. Kabit —— asawang nakatira sa iba
  18. Kalbo —- gupit ng buhok na korteng itlog
  19. Dalaga ——— babaeng gustong maging ina
  20. Dalaginding – dalagang hindi pa nagsusuot ng bra
  21. Dighay ——- Utot na lumabas sa bunganga
  22. Dilim —- liwanag na maitim
  23. Ginang — asawa ni ginoo na mukha nang tsimay
  24. Ginoo —- asawa ni ginang na may asawang iba
  25. Gipit —- kalagayan ng tao na suki na ng sanglaan
  26. Ha ——- sagot ng nagbibingi-bingihan
  27. Halakhak – tawang bukang-buka ang ngala-ngala
  28. Handaan — magdamagan na Palakihan ng tiyan
  29. Handog — bigay na laging may kapalit
  30. Hipo —– haplos na may malisya
  31. Hudas —- tapat na manloloko
  32. Ibon —– hayop na lumalangoy sa Hangin
  33. Imposible – pagtaas ng unano
  34. Ina ——– pamilyadang gustong maging dalaga
  35. Insulto — walang hiyang biro
  36. Isda —— hayop na hindi nalulunod
  37. Itlog ——- pagkaing amoy uto
  38. Ita ——- negrong Pinoy
  39. La ——– ikli ng ‘lalalalala’ sa kinakantang hindi maalala
  40. Lalawigan – syudad ng kahirapan
  41. Langaw —- kulisap na bangung-bango sa amoy ng basura
  42. Ma ——– tawag sa gelpren na mukhang nanay na
  43. Malusog — hitsura ng tumatabang balat
  44. Mama —— tawag sa sosyal na ina
  45. Mano —— kaugaliang Pinoy na nakapupudpod ng noo…. at bulsa
  46. Mantika — katas ng piniritong taba
  47. Mayabang ——– abusadong tanga
  48. Maybahay — dominanteng utusan sa bahay
  49. Nanay —- Ilaw ng tahana
  50. Nakaw —– hiram ng walang paala
  51. Naku —— ikli ng ‘nanay ko, nanay na ako.
  52. Nitso —– bahay ng mga patay
  53. Nobya —– gelpren na laking probinsya
  54. Ngalngal — iyak ng walang ipen
  55. Ngisi —– tawang tulo-laway
  56. Ngiti —– tawang labas ipen
  57. Paa ——- bahagi ng katawan na amoy tuta
  58. Paaralan — dito itinuturo kung ano, alin o sino ang mapipiling bobo
  59. Panata —- dasal na nakatataba ng tuhod
  60. Regla —– masungit na panahon ng pagkababae
  61. Sabon —– mabangong bagay na ipinapahid sa mabahong katawan
  62. Sakristan – utusan ng pari
  63. Sampal —- haplos na nakatitigas ng mukha.
  64. Ta ——– ikli ng ‘tita’ o lalaking may bra
  65. Tamad —– taong hindi napapagod sa pahinga
  66. Tatay —– haligi ng tahanan
  67. Utot——– Dighay na lumabas sa puwit
  68. Ulol ——– sobrang matalino
  69. Wala ——- salitang tagalog na minana ng mga ingles
  70. Yaya ——– alaga ng ama ng inaalagaang bata

* * * * * * * * * * * *

 

euroa-motor-inn-banner1.gif

« Previous PageNext Page »


Entries and comments feeds.